Yes, yes, skeptics play an important role in paranormal investigation. They bring a level of logical reasoning that balances the accuracy of an investigation, while adding credence to the evidence they can’t explain. But I’m not talking about the helpful skeptics. No, I’m talking about the buzzkill, I’m always right, if I can’t experience it then you’re a liar, type skeptics. No, thank you, to that negativity.
However, as I had a dream about writing this article topic (literally), I feel I must go ahead and write it in the waking world. [Yes, it’s silly, but so am I] So, without further unwanted backstory you may have skipped anyway, here are 10 ways to cleanse a room of skeptics so they can’t ruin your Halloween spooky delights!
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- Open the conversation by stating, “I had a really weird dream last night.” They will find a way to end the conversation there and leave.
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- Whenever you hear knocking or creaking, tense up and hiss whisper, “Did you hear that?” Wide-eyed and intent listening will add to their hasty departure. If they’re too tired and sluggish to move, add, “No one’s up there… should I open my ghost app?” The skeptic will see themselves out.
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- In any room with a mirror, simply creep toward it, and peer at it with caution. Spy around the room and say, “If two mirrors reflect each other, it can create a portal” or “I won’t be looking in this at night!” or take out your phone and snap pictures of the mirror while muttering, “we’ll see, we’ll see.” [Skeptic takes several long strides backward and leaves]
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- Ask, “Do you have any tinfoil?” while searching online hat designs. “I need a lot.” Mission accomplished. [Let the conspiracy theories chatter begin!]
. - Stop asking people what they do for a living and start asking questions with fascinating answers. “Have you ever lived in a haunted house?” “Have you ever seen a ghost?” “Smelled a ghost?” “Heard a ghost?” “Bigfoot?” “Tasted a— OK bye! See you later.” [Wipes hands]
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- Light a candle. Then add, “I’m lighting this with intention.” [Skeptic backs slowly away]
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- Casually, while scrolling your phone. “There’s this candlelight ghost tour I want to experience. Wanna come? It’s short, though, only like two hours.” [Bye!]
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- Open a ghost app and shush anyone talking. Don’t let up with the shushing. Not quite aggressive, but an assertive shush. True ghost obsessives will be unable to resist the thrall of a paranormal investigation. Skeptics will see themselves out.
. - “Want to help me?” [Innocent grin] “I’m moving about five dozen crystals to windowsills to charge in the moonlight.” Manual labour and crystal magic is a no brainer. The combination is so excellent at removing skeptics you won’t even need any black tourmaline or obsidian!
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- The easiest, most effective way is simply to ask, “Want to tell ghost stories? I have so many!” Many skeptics fear their beliefs being shaken and will flee. Please take caution here. Many are more sensitive than they seem.
There you have it! Rest easy this Halloween season, and if you’re anything like me, all year round when discussing paranormal events and a skeptic is ruining the conversation. Don’t worry. It’s not mean. They’ll likely be perfectly content talking about something bland in the next room. Happy Halloween!
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Published October 29, 2026.