…to make any maid, matron, or vixen roll her eyes, grimace, and gag.
This one is not for younger audiences or the easily offended. Everyone else, please enjoy!
If any of the following bad pick up lines make you squirm, as well as laugh, well, that’s exactly how I felt writing them. Please be grateful there is no historical evidence that any of these terrible Tudor pick up lines were ever used. [Phew!] Though, I do think there is a possibility the last one may have been uttered by King Henry VIII at some point…
- You caught my eye like peacock pye.
. - Your gong farmer paid me a visit. He said you’re so sweet your waste smells like roses.
. - Call me a nit because I’m stuck on you.
. - You must be inflicted with sweating sickness because everyone swoons when you happen past.
. - [Henry VIII] I fed my chickens promises to have a son and they all died. I want you to live.
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